SEO Tools For Dummies

I will start with the tools you SHOULD NOT USE when you are new.

Plenty of experts will recommend SEMRUSH or Ahrefs or even Nozzle, but I guarantee you that is not what YOU want in the beginning.

First, it’s usually out of most solopreneurs budget.

Second, if you never used those tools before you will feel like you need 7 diplomas on the wall to even understand what the fuck it’s all about.

That leads to endless dabbling around and getting nowhere. Your sole purpose when starting in SEO is just to move the fuck along with the most basic stuff that any toddler can do.


What I recommend

Before I go into a short list, I want to add the following:

I own plenty of blogs. I use all the Ferraris, Bentleys, and Rolls Royces of tools out there.

But you know what, none of that matters. I have a lot of contractors that assist me in building what I do. And not everyone has touched, used, or even heard of tools like SEMRUSH.

Which made me believe, I need to shift my internal framework to something dummy-proof.

Something that is teachable in less than 30 minutes or can be written up in a simple document to do the following things:

  • Find me keywords according to my needs (more on that later)
  • Find me topics
  • Check data
  • Find me more keywords
  • Document the keywords
  • Repeat

The list is in no particular order, but when you just start out you don’t need more than a handful of things.

I separated each bracket and you can pick whatever you want.


  • Obsidian (I use it)
  • Whimsical (I use it)
  • Google Docs or MS Word
  • Pen and paper (yes, I use it)


  • Excel or Google Sheets (I use Excel)
  • (I use it)
  • Notion (I am no fan, but I understand why others do)


  • Google Analytics (but THEY ARE RETARDED with their GA4 so I stopped using them)
  • Google Search Console (I use it)
  • Bing Webmaster Tools (yes I use it)

Keyword Tools

Topic Mojo (dummy-proof)

I use them because my team can find at a high pace dozens of topics that produce better results than ChatGPT. And it takes 2 mins to explain how it works.

Is Topic Mojo needed? No. you can start without it.

Uber Suggest

To be clear, I am no fan of Neil Patel and he talks so fast like a kid on XTC that I am ready to jump out of the window.

But when it comes to the most stupid, idiotic and dummy-proof keyword tool for beginners, Uber Suggest still ranks at the top.


Their pricing model is per month or a lifetime deal as long as I can remember. I once bought the lifetime deal and to date, NO REGRETS.

I showcased this keyword tool to newbies and contractors in my business on screen and more than 90% of the people understood the goal, how it works and what I need in less than 10 minutes.


Fucking up in Uber Suggest can only be done when your IQ is lower than the temperature on the North Pole, which I doubt will happen.

I will create/write an example in this guide down the line.

Alternative KW tools

Those I recommend, once you move up a bit in your learning curve, that are affordable, easy to use and won’t bring you nightmares.

Get it?

Whoever tells you that you need a fuck ton of stuff to start with SEO is wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.


Those so-called experts will glorify their entire job to make you feel small and are basically talking out of their asses.

They prey on beginners or dummies that have ZERO knowledge of SEO.



It’s not about WHAT you USE, it’s about where to look for in SEO.

Now, let’s talk about Keyword Volume. (the exciting part)